I live in a world of constant worry – worry that I won’t measure up to somebody else’s perfect standards. I’ve always cared about what everybody else thinks, but never thought about what I wanted. Over my adult lifetime, this perfectionism held me back from many life experiences, friendships, and a true relationship with God.
Growing up as a child of immigrant parents, the guilt from living a privileged life shaped my perfectionism. I never wanted to disappoint my parents. I did fairly well in school and university, but my perfectionism was more pronounced in other aspects of my life, such as my social life. I had a certain picture in my head of how I wanted to be perceived by others, and so, if I felt that I didn’t measure up, I avoided the situation at all costs. I missed out on a lot in life: friendships, networking opportunities, advancements in my careers, traveling and other hobbies.